forgivetheinsubordination | IC Contact

[Garrus glances up a little sheepishly.]

Yes. I am.

[And back down to look at what he's doing.]

The flowers can regrow. No point in killing it.

[He's given Red a poor first impression, with his assumption that they were going hunting animals instead of gathering plants.]

I kill when there's purpose.

[He stays only a little back from her as she moves, ready to catch Erin if she falls. It's definitely a possibility. By the time she's lying down, he's by her bunk.]

You're welcome.

[It's just as quiet.]

Would you like a blanket or water or something, or should I go?

[ He feels like there's a purpose in those last words, but maybe even if there wasn't, the boy's face becomes tense and there's a space between when Garrus speaks and Red does, some of that taken up by Red shrugging off his bag from off his shoulders and opening it. ]

We can put the flowers in here. [ But then. ] ...Is it safe for you to move while it's still on you? Is it just the tip that's dangerous?

FROM: erin@cdc.org

Details you don't have a right to share but you're sharing details anyway

FROM: erin@cdc.org

I've seen him in action, he doesn't go down that easy. Do you know what did it?

FROM: erin@cdc.org

Because if there's something out there that can do that to him I think I have a right to know about it.

FROM: erin@cdc.org

Does this have something to do with Warriorhead?

FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org

You don't have a right. I didn't even have the right to know and I'm Green and he's my instructor.

FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org

I'm trying to skirt around things to be fair, Erin. Don't make me regret saying as much as I have already. Know you're not in any more danger than we've all been all along.

[She's already nesting into her ridiculous pile of blankets, dislodging feathers as she does. Eh. She'll pick them up later.]

I'm okay. I think I'll sleep for a while, see how I am when I wake up.

[Or more accurately, lie here and stare at the ceiling for a while, but rest is rest.]

FROM: erin@cdc.org

"Don't make you regret saying as much as you have already."

[That's it. That's all she says back. Erin has never taken well to being stonewalled, not by Garrett, not by anyone.

She's going to ask Mothership directly.]

FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org

In other words, you're going to? That's a great sign, Erin. Real glad you had faith in it being something that maybe shouldn't be shared around. In my word.

[Someone's temper has had a very bad day today.]

All right. Call me, please, if anything changes.

[And then with that he's heading for the door, planning on leaving and closing the rover behind him unless she stops him. Seeing as she hadn't wanted to go to Medical, Garrus thinks it's a safe bet she doesn't want company.]

The tip's what is dangerous. And I've got full armor and gloves. I'm all right so long as it doesn't get my head.

[Garrus' booted foot is resting on the hand of this particular limb, meaning he's not entirely safe, but he's done what he can for now. And the slow-moving vine likely won't be able to surprise him with Red watching.

He starts dropping the flowers in the bag.]

Have you tried out your juggernaut yet?

[There's no answer, but not because she hasn't seen the return message. She wasn't planning on telling Mothership where she heard the news that Armada's being taken care of, but now she's tempted to out of spite.

Sorry, Garrus, Erin is really bad at friends.]

FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org

I won't because there's no one to crush on!!!

[ Ah... she was supposed to be not replying. ]

FROM: yamanaka.ino@cdc.org

Bye.

[ The guy with armour is better than the boy without, but hey. There's still the worry of being crept up on while his sight is elsewhere, foot scraping against the dirt with a quick glance down inbetween keeping his eyes peeled on Garrus. ]

Juggernaut, that's- [ Which thing? ] the weapon?

[ Garrus brought up about weapons before. But quickly he interrupts with an unrelated request, before Garrus can answer: ] By the way, can you watch around my feet?

[Garrus gets up so he can see the ground a bit better and drop more flowers in, before coming over to Red and tapping the juggernaut cuff.]

I will. And this. Juggernaut. It's armor. It can be on for a full hour but then it needs to recharge. I'd start learning about using it, if I were you. Weapons will be useful. Armor even more so.

[He holds out his own arm so Red can watch him activate the juggernaut and the way the armor forms around Garrus before he deactivates it.]

Mine's heavier than yours in terms of what it can block. It's just a matter of being here longer. You'll get an upgrade before long too, whether it's the heavier armor, gauntlets that shoot electricity, or settings that let you fly.

[ It's useful information, and Red's reminded of being shown before how to activate the juggernaut in the past when Garrus does so as well, but the conversation leads onto talks of upgrades that he just gives a few slow nods here and there and an awkward- ] Right.

[ He knows there's not much choice to their situation (except damning his planet, pokémon, and himself, that is) and it's a fact he's been struggling through, but to hear all this talk - regardless of usefulness - makes him wish that Charizard would come back soon. It'd be a good way to move on and to talk about the fruits and plants and have Red be able to ignore the subject and how beyond lost it makes him feel.

But Charizard hasn't been gone that long, and reality isn't as easy to ignore as that. He doesn't want to either. Not really. ]

...Whatever I have to learn, I won't leave Charizard's side. [ Out of any topic he can think to touch, that's the first to come. ] Me and my pokémon, we work together -- especially if it's me and Charizard. If he goes anywhere, I go too.

[ It's just a fact, softly spoken, and one that Red doesn't want to break no matter. ]

All right.

[It's not like it's an issue right now. There may be times in the future when it's practical for Charizard or Arcanine to go forward, to scout or take a separate position, but that'll be in the future and up to Red. And by then maybe the boy will be ready for tactics like that.

He glances up at the sky, wondering how this current situation fits into Red's resolve, but Garrus doesn't ask. Pushing the point would only drive the kid away, not help anything or anyone.]

Do we wanna move forward, see what other plants we can spot? And you can still fight side-by-side with Charizard and still train to use weaponry and armor yourself.

[ If anything, the conversation they've had now is as much of a reason why Red gestures his head in the direction that Charizard had gone. ]

I want to go this way. If we go too far in Charizard won't see us, and I want to see Charizard too. He won't be much longer.

[ Red doesn't walk without waiting for Garrus to agree, yet he stands and speaks like it's what he's set on. That, or he's just finding it harder for his body to relax. Should Garrus have no problem with this decision and moving away from the trees - and the boy will follow him - the orange creature won't be hard to spot -- he's amidst the open landscape, down on his feet than in the air.

And Garrus might just see him pull a chunk of something out the ground and drop it into his basket. ]

[That's... only a response to part of what he'd been saying, and Garrus gives Red a curious glance. Maybe the boy thinks that as long as he doesn't have training he won't have to kill personally? It might even be technically true. Charizard might do all of the killing for him. But Red doesn't strike Garrus as someone who could leave the dirty duties to others.]

All right.

[He follows the boy's lead, moving at a decent pace, catching sight of Charizard easily.]

So why don't you pick the next conversation topic? Since you don't seem to be going for mine.

[There's some awkwardness here, ever since the misunderstanding about hunting versus gathering, and Garrus isn't quite sure how to defuse it.]

[ The relief in seeing Charizard is better than what he'd imagine, and Red stops walking once he catches sight of him; however, a small pang of guilt drops in his stomach at Garrus's words. There had been a reason for delaying an answer on the subject that time, but he knows he's been like a rock through the subject that it doesn't make a difference. ]

I wasn't ignoring you. [ Being difficult, true, but not ignoring. ] I just... I'm finding it hard to talk about.

[ He knows it isn't a good reason, and he doesn't want it to be an excuse. It's an opportunity for him to do more than think about it to himself and to Charizard, but then one thing or another unsettles him. It's hard to just discuss, to question about this and that like he did with people back in Kanto. That was all about pokémon, not-- killing.

Red continues to keep an eye on Charizard's distant figure, not facing away from Garrus for any other reason than to watch his pokémon, and he stands with a lack of an intention to move. ]

Can I ask you though... what did you do before you came here? Did you do anything like this? [ ... ] Did you ever hold a weapon before?

[ She wants to contradict him. Point out that she's never had a relationship work out, usually because she ruined them.

But somehow it doesn't feel right to do so. He's trying to believe that there are people for whom this crazy thing works. Tearing it down right now for the sake of argument just ... makes her feel kind of gross.

So she doesn't. She shrugs, awkward and teenage, and lets it go. ]

Yeah, well. I hope I'm getting it right.

[He takes a breath and nods.]

Obviously don't have the basics down myself. But if you ever need someone to help you out with it, I'm willing.

[He's never tried before. It's probably shown. And while he knows he doesn't want to deal with that pain ever again, he also knows that there's a great deal of what he'd had that he'd enjoyed and he'll miss. It's a mess. And he wishes it could be otherwise.]

[Oh this is not going to go well.]

Knew you weren't ignoring me. Figured you were struggling so I gave you an out.

[And now he's out of easy stuff. What he did. There isn't really a way to dance around it. Garrus shakes his head and takes a breath.]

I've served in military positions my whole adult life. Police at first. Sniper. Helped fight to save the galaxy. Went vigilante and took out criminals. Helped fight to save the galaxy again.

[A beat.]

What you're asking is if I've killed before. And I have. Criminals. Slavers. Drug dealers who preyed on their customers. And then I got here, and I've now killed people who aren't soldiers, who aren't criminals, because it's part of what was required of Green team.

[It's just like he'd told Shuyi. It's getting harder by the day to see himself as good.]

[ It's not a surprise. It was already there in the way Garrus spoke before he confirmed it, and the position of a police officer fits with what Red imagined. His story is big and would be a source to awe in places and plenty of questions everywhere, but here -- here wasn't the time.

A long moment sits after Garrus finishes before Red speaks. ]

When you're a soldier in a war, there's going to be casualties. People get killed.... and pokémon too. [ ... ] I met a man once when I was on a journey back home to help a professor. He was a gym leader, a person who took on challenges and gave people who defeated him a badge of proof. He said he was a lieutenant in a war, and he and his pokémon fought be each other's side and kept each other safe. Half of everyone in his gym was a soldier once.

I didn't really think about it back then. When he said he fought in a war and his pokémon had been there with him, I just thought... of how strong of a bond they must have, and how tough they must be.

[ Not: What was it like to be in a war? Did they ever lose anyone? How did you cope? ]

I keep thinking about him now. What he had to do. How did he fight? What was it like for him and his pokémon? I wish I could talk to him now. [ He faces Garrus, and his voice grows with his words. ] I don't know weapons, I don't know about armour -- I know pokémon. I know how to take care of them. What should I do? What did he tell his pokémon?

[ He stops himself, looking away. A hand raises to brush through his hair, deliberately blocking his face with the way his arm bends and lingers after the hand grows still. Did he have to say anything to his pokémon? Why they were seeing the things they saw now? ]

We went up against those neraki... we fought the flying creatures. He took them down because they wouldn't stay down. I don't know if any survived.

[ Red breathes, sucking in the air through his nose, and his eyes close for a time with the tip of his head. ]

We have to do it because there's no other choice. We love where we come from too much. [ Wherever his words were meant to lead him, the reason for originally asking Garrus about his history with killing is already lost from his mind. Somewhere, it was meant to help. Achieve something. ]

I don't intend to have him fight alone. He won't carry all the weight.

[The response he gets goes beyond all of his expectations. He'd thought Red would feel scared, worried, might want to continue on without Garrus, because everything to this point had said Red was uncomfortable. Instead, the boy's showing wisdom and an attempt at compassion. Garrus is impressed, and he stays quiet the whole time Red speaks.

Red wraps up, and Garrus nods, watching the boy.]

That's the approach that will keep you both together.

[And alive. At least, not dead from the CDC.]

Whatever I can do to help you there, I'm here, Red. I'll train you with weapons and the juggernaut, get you up to speed. And I'll teach you what it is to be a soldier. The two of you, fighting side-by-side, carrying the weight together.

[ There's no sudden clarity to Red. There's no less fear or doubt, no certain relief from speaking out his thoughts that had been going over his head since the illuminated night before. Garrus sounds more sure than he feels in that moment, but he doesn't want to confess to that; not when the otherworldly-man is trying to give his support (and has been trying for the majority of their trip out).

He's still plenty scared, about what he won't be able to do when it matters.

So Red just nods, silently, and gaze goes back out in the direction Charizard had been - and the pokémon was in flight, heading their way. ]

Can we just collect the food for now? Sorry... but I can't pick flowers and talk about something like this at the same time. It's too... strange.

IC Contact - Consignment

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