Garrus Vakarian (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
forgivetheinsubordination) wrote2037-04-27 09:49 pm
forgivetheinsubordination) wrote2037-04-27 09:49 pm
Entry tags:
IC Contact - Consignment
vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
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vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
no subject
I can't go that far. Ajna saw us lose people too, and I remember their bodies being sprinkled over camp by an enemy we never caught.
FROM: dartagnan@cdc.org
It's not just the ship, Garrus. It's all of this. We will never be safe so long as we're with the CDC. It seems to come with the job.
no subject
We'll catch them. They came after us once and got away. They'll feel confident and try again, and this next time, we'll stop them.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
But you're right in that there's always something else. Life's always got something else. There's never a moment when you're really safe, unless you're a civilian and far from everything.
no subject
There’s a difference between the danger of a soldier’s life, and this. You know there is, and besides that, half the people here are supposed to be civilians anyway.
FROM: dartagnan@cdc.org
There are people like Hanna, who was never trained to fight before. And like Arya, who’s a child, and now she’s one of the missing. They ought to be far from this. They ought to be safe.
[ And yet neither one of them would have been any safer in their own worlds, anyway. D’Artagnan knows this. He knows both their stories, knows where they come from. His problem is that it seems so wrong to him, worse than dishonourable. Why is it that what’s right or wrong seems so meaningless here? Is it really such a strange thing to want to act on that basis? To want to defend, and protect people, because that’s what ought to be done, and not just because it’s a job? ]
FROM: dartagnan@cdc.org
Don’t tell me this is just how life is. We owe it to those we’ve lost to be better than that. For their sake, and for everyone we still protect.
no subject
I know we need to do better. I don't know how. Slept the minimum needed. Trained only a little. Stood still only when at a post. Kept in touch with everyone I needed to. Know you did the same.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
What didn't we do that we should have done? What else do we need to focus on?
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
I know there's a difference, I know we need to do more, and half the time here neither of those things matter. We can't protect them any more than anyone else when there's nothing we can do.
no subject
I don't know either. I just don't want to put this all down to inevitability.
FROM: dartagnan@cdc.org
You're right, of course. We're doing everything we can.
no subject
It's not inevitable. I'd like to think we still protected some. I don't know if it's true, but we were there.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
You're right too. We'll adapt. Somehow.
no subject
I hope so. I don’t want to lose anyone else.
no subject
I hear you. And I agree. No more Artillery losses.
no subject
One of us ought to report Javik. Do you want me to do it?
no subject
Please. Rather the disappearance be treated like a Green missing than get sympathy for it being another of my crew. Don't need that weight right now.
no subject
I'll take care of it. We'll keep trying, Garrus. We're not giving up.
no subject
I know. I'm stubborn in the good way. Or so everyone except my enemies think.
no subject
We can ask our enemies' opinion when we catch them.
FROM: dartagnan@cdc.org
Provided they stay breathing long enough for that.
no subject
They will. We need information on top of opinions.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Let me know if anything else comes up. I'll do the same.
no subject
I will.
[ He'll sign off for now. ]