forgivetheinsubordination | IC Contact

Not titans.

[That's all he'll say on the matter, even if pressed. His head hurts, and he sucks in a slow, shaky sort of breath when Garrus tells him to. He doesn't want to think about this. He doesn't want to live knowing what he's done, but he can't give up now, not after he's come so far. His nails bite into his skin in a futile attempt to distract himself.

Garrus' words help. Reiner doesn't say anything at first, forcing his mind to wrap around that knowledge. Fighting...]

This isn't a fight. It's an extermination. Or it was.

Edited 2015-04-04 03:04 (UTC)

[Not titans. A third species? But the lack of elaboration speaks as much as words would - Reiner doesn't want to answer that question. Not yet, at least.

The young man's knuckles are going white as he digs his nails in, and the breath definitely isn't steady. Reiner isn't all right with what had happened. Garrus doesn't know that he can chalk it up to regret, though, no matter how much he'd like to. The last two words make his heart seize up, though.]

Was.

[If the wiping out is over, then Jean's dead. Mikasa's dead. Eren, Erwin, Levi, all of the ones he's met here are gone, but Jean is the one that really hurts. Garrus doesn't want to ask for clarification, doesn't want to know for sure that one of his young is lost due to the actions of another.

Garrus' subharmonics aren't completely steady as he speaks again. They're a little shaky, a little weighed down. Roxas is dead, Xion is probably dead, Jean... Every name on that list makes him realize that he can only keep them safe here.]

Can you tell me how it started?

[He can hear that strangeness in Garrus' already odd voice, and he isn't sure what the reason for it is.]

We had our mission. [Is all he says, deliberately staying vague. He knows that the turian is well-acquainted with Jean, and he doesn't deem it necessary to give anything away that could ruin them if they ever manage to get back home.]

But. Then things changed. [Eren. Searching for the Coordinate. So much that they hadn't expected. But they'd adapted, hadn't they? And then Annie had gotten caught, and...]

Even if I hate myself more than anything... I will see my home again. No matter what.

[Garrus shakes his head after Reiner answers, realizing how the boy took his question.]

I mean the conflict. How the conflict between titans and humans started. Not asking for military secrets.

[As much as he's worried for Jean, he can't ask for those. He won't betray the trust placed in him right now.]

Why do you hate yourself, now? You were fighting for your people, by the sounds of it.

[Reiner only shakes his head in turn.] I don't know. I was given my mission and knew I had to complete it. [Even if he knew, he's not sure he can bring himself to talk about it.]

Because I... betrayed them. Everyone. I forgot who I was, what my mission was... I thought I was a human soldier just like the rest of them, not a shifter.

Is my own selfishness justification for getting that many people killed?

You forgot, or you were made to forget? Because it's sounding like they did something when they sent you in.

[A war so old that nobody remembers the beginning? Is that how entrenched it is? That would make sense for humanity living behind twin walls.]

Is it so wrong to fight for what you believe in?

[Reiner hesitates.] I forgot. Who wants to live with the knowledge that they killed so many people selfishly?

They were just... people. Not involved. I chose to forget, like a coward, because I couldn't live with the guilt.

[His tone hardens.] The CDC knows I won't hesitate to wipe people out. That's why they recruited me.

[Willful forgetfulness. Garrus hasn't ever heard of that working before. He's quiet for a few moments before he looks over at Reiner.]

You won't? That's why guilt caused you that many problems? You're prepared to kill people selfishly?

[His tone is mild as he brings Reiner's words back around to the young man.]

How'd you get to that point?

[Because it's not a good point to be at.]

IC Contact - Consignment

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject