forgivetheinsubordination | IC Contact

[ Lydia he hadn't know had a connection to Garrus. Had seen her in a long while, though after what Garrus says, he recalls her ability back on Ajna.

The instructors say there's not proof, but the fact that Lydia could sense death makes her own death among a group of others all that more suspicious.

He's not going to push theories right now though. Sometimes, it helps. Right now, he's not so sure. They're stuck. Hands tied, and the likely culprit is freely roaming the halls.

A pause follows, his fingers tapping against the glass in front of him as he stares at it distantly. ]

Only thing we can do now is keep going for them.

[ For the ones Garrus is looking after, and for the memory of the ones he's lost. It's Rikki that Steve thinks about now. Another death in a long list with answers even less clear. ]

Yeah. I know.

[Those words are... well. They're ones he's heard, plenty, ones he's even said. They're just... words, at this point. He takes another drink of his beer.]

And for ourselves, and for all of that. I'm not stopping, Steve. Not gonna let up, or give up, or... Or any of that.

[Garrus sighs.]

But you said we. Did they matter to you? Or someone else?

[He needs to find some thing to record the names of those he'd cared about who have left. The list is getting long, and it will only get longer.]

[ He gives Garrus a wry sort of look for the sigh. There's no argument though. They've been repeating the same mantra to themselves for months, a year.

His head tilts to one side, eyes still fixed on his glass. ]

I didn't know them - Xion I'd met once or twice. [ April he'd never met. It's not just the deaths either, their numbers were hit pretty hard by the transfer. ] How many of us do you think are left from that first drop?

[ Less than a quarter of the first recruits that hit Ajna? He doesn't have solid numbers, remembers a lot of the names, but not all of them. ]

[So there's a name, but Steve isn't saying it. And then it clicks that maybe it's not someone dead Steve is thinking about, but transferred, and Peggy got transferred quite some time ago. For all they know, the transfers are dead by now. Clary came back, sure, but have many others?

Steve's question gets a shake of his head.]

Of the... I've got to say 200. There had to be as many as that in the initial camp. I'd say we've got around an sixth left, tops. Probably closer to a seventh.

[They've just lost another of the original group, too. Mogget. Garrus is going to miss the cat, miss the warmth against the back of his neck and the wry snark. Reiner had been here all along, hadn't he? Kakashi? So that's three, not just one.]

Two of the four I shared the first rover with are here. Probably one of very few who can say that. Why?

[Where's this going?]

[ Hanbei too. Baku. It's the same for him though. Shinji and Sharon are still around from his first rover.

He raises his eyebrows, as if considering the question, then shakes his head with a slight shrug, his tone almost apologetic. ]

I don't know. Just thinking out loud, I guess. [ He finally takes a drink from the glass in front of him. It's not going anywhere. He'd come around here just with the intention to check on Garrus and talk, but now he's soured his own mood. ]

And now we're both thinking about losses.

[There's the faintest bit of dryness to the comment, and he follows it up with a drink.]

Can't really guarantee that anyone'll stay. But for those that do, we'll keep being Green. Keep being the protection, as best we can. Just wish...

[He shakes his head.]

Wish that we'd stop taking the losses. That Xion had given anyone a head's up when leaving camp to do whatever it was that had her run into something too strong for her. Gather plants? Animals? Either way, we might benefit from a stronger buddy system. Or something. I don't know. Talking after a few beers here.

[ He frowns at that last part - before the comment about beers. ]

Maybe she didn't think she was going alone.

[ Xion hadn't been the only casualty listed. And more often than not, these strange deaths happen to groups rather than individuals. The deaths on the ship, the dismembered bodies on Ajna. ]

Maybe she didn't.

[Had she known April or Lydia? Garrus has no way to know.]

An attack shouldn't have taken Lydia by surprise, at least.

[So maybe she'd been there, with the others. Maybe they'd known something was coming? He has nothing, though. Garrus sighs.]

It's all a guessing game, after, when we don't know what happened. Dead end. Regrets and frustration. Can't afford to dwell on it, can't afford to forget them, though. Think I need to start writing down names.

[He's pretty sure he's already forgot some of the names of people he's met here who have gone on to die or be transferred and might be dead elsewhere.]

There anything you do?

Edited 2015-06-07 19:07 (UTC)

[ He doesn't consider it much of a guessing game, but with no proof Garrus isn't wrong - they're stuck at another dead end.

His brow furrows at the question, head tilting to the side again. ]

Drink. [ When he could in the field, even when it didn't do anything - like now. Memorials had been erected and words long past printed by the time he found out most of his friends were dead. He carries all of his ghosts with him. ] Stay alive.

[ He says both answers without any sense of facetiousness. ]

[There's a lead, but again, no proof. If something comes up he'll take it, but until then... Until then, it's basically as Steve says.]

Drink. Stay alive.

[Garrus' hand goes up to his visor and he pulls it off. It's the first time Steve will have seen Garrus without it, and if Rogers looks at where Garrus' thumb is tracing, there's a list of names burned on the inside.]

And remember. As long as you remember, they're not completely gone.

[He raises his bottle with his other hand, holds it out toward Steve.]

To them?

[ His gaze travels along the names under Garrus' thumb, an unspoken understanding in his expression. When his eyes lift to the turian's face again, there's something of a somber smile tipping one side of his mouth as he raises his own bottle. ]

To them.

IC Contact - Consignment

I looked upthread and saw this was Day 123... PRETEND IT'S DAY 124 sdkjfsk

Numbers schmumbers. IT IS NOW DAY 124

HOORAY

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