Garrus Vakarian (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
forgivetheinsubordination) wrote2037-04-27 09:49 pm
forgivetheinsubordination) wrote2037-04-27 09:49 pm
Entry tags:
IC Contact - Consignment
vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Please let me know if you or Green need anything.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Know there's not much I can do. But I'm here.
[If only Arcanine could have helped keep Green safe... But none of them could have.]
Please let me know if you or Green need anything.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Know there's not much I can do. But I'm here.
[If only Arcanine could have helped keep Green safe... But none of them could have.]
Go ahead. Consider it a bedtime story.
[He settles in, leaning forward and steepling his fingers together.] I was never really the type to "settle down" with one boss. It was just too bad a business to commit all the way to, even if I got pulled in and couldn't pull myself out.
So when I went to Liberty City and got pulled in, there was this chain of asshole bosses I worked for. Eventually a stronger guy would get pissed at another, higher up in the chain of command, and have me kill the guy I used to work for.
There was this one, though, who dicked me over. I never could corner him but he was making my life a living hell.
There was this collection of old families operating out of Liberty City. "The Commission." I eventually ended up working for one of the guys in the Commission in secret, he had ties to the American government, Gravelli. At the same time, I am working for this asshole who wants into the Commission, Pegorino. I think it is called "delusions of grandeur". He thought he was important, but he paid. All the while the guy I know on the Commission is just laughing because he thinks the whole thing is funny. And Pegorino, he keeps doing things like hiring me to kill guys that work for him, even killing a guy that he is supposed to love like a son.
Well, I finally got what I came to Liberty City for, and I was technically out. But Pegorino, he comes and tells me that he has one last job. But the piece of shit is working with the guy who has been harassing me for months.
I got two choices. Take the money and make my cousin happy because he will never want for anything again. Or, get rid of the guy that is harassing me because I know he will keep it up, and just not do the job at all.
[He settles in, leaning forward and steepling his fingers together.] I was never really the type to "settle down" with one boss. It was just too bad a business to commit all the way to, even if I got pulled in and couldn't pull myself out.
So when I went to Liberty City and got pulled in, there was this chain of asshole bosses I worked for. Eventually a stronger guy would get pissed at another, higher up in the chain of command, and have me kill the guy I used to work for.
There was this one, though, who dicked me over. I never could corner him but he was making my life a living hell.
There was this collection of old families operating out of Liberty City. "The Commission." I eventually ended up working for one of the guys in the Commission in secret, he had ties to the American government, Gravelli. At the same time, I am working for this asshole who wants into the Commission, Pegorino. I think it is called "delusions of grandeur". He thought he was important, but he paid. All the while the guy I know on the Commission is just laughing because he thinks the whole thing is funny. And Pegorino, he keeps doing things like hiring me to kill guys that work for him, even killing a guy that he is supposed to love like a son.
Well, I finally got what I came to Liberty City for, and I was technically out. But Pegorino, he comes and tells me that he has one last job. But the piece of shit is working with the guy who has been harassing me for months.
I got two choices. Take the money and make my cousin happy because he will never want for anything again. Or, get rid of the guy that is harassing me because I know he will keep it up, and just not do the job at all.
[Thinking is not either of their strong suits at this point. It's not exactly a conversation they'd be having if they were both calm and healthy.]
Do you think wiping out planets isn't giving up who we are? Really?
[Everything about this is horrendous. Trying to keep her head down and not make it any worse than it has to be... She doesn't understand what's so much worse about that than what anybody else is doing. She's tapping a foot, hands unable to stay still she's so agitated.]
I went to the Shadow Broker because I was gave in to fear. I'm here because I'm afraid for Rannoch and I gave in. You can't make this as simple as... [She gestures uselessly.] As fight them or you may as well kill yourself.
Thanks, by the way. [And the tone of voice, the words, they're not her, they're too rough and bitter to be her because he just had to bring up the suit, had to push... and as soon as she says them, she stops dead. Swallows. Takes a deep breath.]
Can we stop talking about this?
Do you think wiping out planets isn't giving up who we are? Really?
[Everything about this is horrendous. Trying to keep her head down and not make it any worse than it has to be... She doesn't understand what's so much worse about that than what anybody else is doing. She's tapping a foot, hands unable to stay still she's so agitated.]
I went to the Shadow Broker because I was gave in to fear. I'm here because I'm afraid for Rannoch and I gave in. You can't make this as simple as... [She gestures uselessly.] As fight them or you may as well kill yourself.
Thanks, by the way. [And the tone of voice, the words, they're not her, they're too rough and bitter to be her because he just had to bring up the suit, had to push... and as soon as she says them, she stops dead. Swallows. Takes a deep breath.]
Can we stop talking about this?
[He's taking a breath of his own to argue his point, especially after her 'thanks' which wasn't any sort of thanks at all, when she makes her request. Can they stop talking about it. Stop talking about her just giving in. But more than that, stop counting on her for when it comes time to take down the CDC because he will never stop aiming for that. Especially now.
It hurts to think that maybe when the cards are all in play, she won't be with them. Because he knows where Shepard stands, has a feeling Joker will be just as up with taking them down, but until this very moment he'd expected Tali to be along... and he can't even make that clear.
Garrus looks down, takes a couple of steps back and sits down.]
Yeah.
[Maybe there will be a time when she's not frightened and he can edge around it in the future. There's a chance there won't be. As he pours the two glasses, Garrus wonders if he shouldn't just be drinking to ease the pain, but if he should be mourning as well. His voice and ragged subharmonics are sad as he speaks and holds out a cup to her.]
Pick a topic, Tali.
It hurts to think that maybe when the cards are all in play, she won't be with them. Because he knows where Shepard stands, has a feeling Joker will be just as up with taking them down, but until this very moment he'd expected Tali to be along... and he can't even make that clear.
Garrus looks down, takes a couple of steps back and sits down.]
Yeah.
[Maybe there will be a time when she's not frightened and he can edge around it in the future. There's a chance there won't be. As he pours the two glasses, Garrus wonders if he shouldn't just be drinking to ease the pain, but if he should be mourning as well. His voice and ragged subharmonics are sad as he speaks and holds out a cup to her.]
Pick a topic, Tali.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Low bar, when 'alive' is about all that can be said. But I understand. Been a long approximate year, hasn't it.
Low bar, when 'alive' is about all that can be said. But I understand. Been a long approximate year, hasn't it.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
I will. I'll make sure you know I'm not dead.
I will. I'll make sure you know I'm not dead.
FROM: red@cdc.org
theres a guy called kotetsu. he told me he knows green if youre worried about him. were both trainers but he doesnt trust me or anything
[ As much as he'd like to think that he could do more for Green, even trying to do much for the one he knew probably wouldn't go much better. He doubts this one cares that much about him, and he hasn't any reason to. Late night voice mails dripping with regret and vulnerability and a few texts messages after doesn't change that.
He's just some kid. So should Green be, to him. ]
theres a guy called kotetsu. he told me he knows green if youre worried about him. were both trainers but he doesnt trust me or anything
[ As much as he'd like to think that he could do more for Green, even trying to do much for the one he knew probably wouldn't go much better. He doubts this one cares that much about him, and he hasn't any reason to. Late night voice mails dripping with regret and vulnerability and a few texts messages after doesn't change that.
He's just some kid. So should Green be, to him. ]
[She doesn't want to stop. She wants to keep going, ask him if that's what this is all about - whether she's willing to fight the CDC or not. Make him ask her outright and tell him the cold truth: not while they have a hold over Rannoch.
She wants to stop feeling like she's having to choose between her friends and her people, like she's failed some kind of test.
But she stops. Takes a breath. Plucks the cup out of his hand and, for a moment, stares blankly down at the gasoline-coloured liquid. Then she takes a drink. There's a clear moment when the look on her face settles from a desolate, helpless anger to something calmer.]
You're letting me choose a topic? Hmm. [This is Tali trying her damndest to recover this to something normal. She moves to sit down, gingerly.] I should wait for you to be more drunk before I start asking about you and Noh-Varr, huh.
She wants to stop feeling like she's having to choose between her friends and her people, like she's failed some kind of test.
But she stops. Takes a breath. Plucks the cup out of his hand and, for a moment, stares blankly down at the gasoline-coloured liquid. Then she takes a drink. There's a clear moment when the look on her face settles from a desolate, helpless anger to something calmer.]
You're letting me choose a topic? Hmm. [This is Tali trying her damndest to recover this to something normal. She moves to sit down, gingerly.] I should wait for you to be more drunk before I start asking about you and Noh-Varr, huh.
[He's not exactly sensible. Which is proven when he stiffly climbs out of bed and heads for the door, opening it up to see Erin there. For once, he's not in his full armor. Instead, he's wearing a simple tunic and leggings, which make him look far less bulky than the typical metal. The visor's back on, though.]
Erin.
[Garrus steps outside and closes his rover door behind him. There are a few people who could use sleep in there.]
Hey. Was a little worried when I didn't hear back from you.
Erin.
[Garrus steps outside and closes his rover door behind him. There are a few people who could use sleep in there.]
Hey. Was a little worried when I didn't hear back from you.
[ It’s disgusting. But again, it’s not a surprise. Not really. The biggest surprise is that it’s taken this long for the taste of bile to return to his mouth here. It had happened more often on Ajna.
He’d gotten complacent. He’d started to think that maybe, there was some sense of honour in them. Especially in Armada. He had cared about the Instructor. He’d thought he was trying to teach him how to survive here, in spite of his morals. Today, it couldn’t be clearer that the Instructors don’t care whether they survive. Too many of d’Artagnan’s friends have been hurt by this. What trust he’d begun to build up is shattered, leaving him all the more bitter that it was ever there in the first place. They’re monsters. He never should have weakened on that. ]
I know. [ A look at Garrus, dark and resolved. ] You looked for what you wanted to see. You looked for honour, and for a sense that they had any care for what happens to us.
We’re nothing to them. We don’t matter and we never have. I had to go into the woods today and keep people away from Hanna while she suffered, so that she didn’t set anyone on fire. That’s what she thought of. That’s what she cared about, not her pain, but that it might make her hurt someone. Yet they do it with the flick of a switch.
He’d gotten complacent. He’d started to think that maybe, there was some sense of honour in them. Especially in Armada. He had cared about the Instructor. He’d thought he was trying to teach him how to survive here, in spite of his morals. Today, it couldn’t be clearer that the Instructors don’t care whether they survive. Too many of d’Artagnan’s friends have been hurt by this. What trust he’d begun to build up is shattered, leaving him all the more bitter that it was ever there in the first place. They’re monsters. He never should have weakened on that. ]
I know. [ A look at Garrus, dark and resolved. ] You looked for what you wanted to see. You looked for honour, and for a sense that they had any care for what happens to us.
We’re nothing to them. We don’t matter and we never have. I had to go into the woods today and keep people away from Hanna while she suffered, so that she didn’t set anyone on fire. That’s what she thought of. That’s what she cared about, not her pain, but that it might make her hurt someone. Yet they do it with the flick of a switch.
[ Sebastian has been doing some light reading since Ciel gave him something of an ultimatum, and after stumbling upon a few particularly interesting tidbits, well. It's time to pursue some leads. ]
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Mr. Vakarian, when you have an opportunity, I would like to speak with you in regards to a few questions that have popped up for me recently.
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
That said, they are not pressing, so it is at your leisure and recovery. I extend my well wishes, though I imagine you may be as happy to receive them as my young master. [ so not at all ]
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Mr. Vakarian, when you have an opportunity, I would like to speak with you in regards to a few questions that have popped up for me recently.
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
That said, they are not pressing, so it is at your leisure and recovery. I extend my well wishes, though I imagine you may be as happy to receive them as my young master. [ so not at all ]
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
I don't see why I wouldn't want well-wishes. But I'm all right. What's up?
I don't see why I wouldn't want well-wishes. But I'm all right. What's up?
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Pardon my assumption, in that case. You have them in earnest, for perhaps I spend too much time with the young master's bitterness.
[ don't even ask, garrus... ]
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Just a question of history, but the amount of text we are limited to makes it somewhat inconvenient. May we speak in person?
Pardon my assumption, in that case. You have them in earnest, for perhaps I spend too much time with the young master's bitterness.
[ don't even ask, garrus... ]
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Just a question of history, but the amount of text we are limited to makes it somewhat inconvenient. May we speak in person?
[quietly - ] In a bit, you may.
Having said that - would you say that your team has done the best they can? That regardless of each recruit's personal shortcomings - would you otherwise evaluate all your efforts as more than adequate?
Having said that - would you say that your team has done the best they can? That regardless of each recruit's personal shortcomings - would you otherwise evaluate all your efforts as more than adequate?
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
I trust you on how Green is. I don't need to contact Kotetsu.
[And maybe that means he should be a little more straightforward.]
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Nobody's gonna tell the truth about how they're doing, I don't think. Nobody wants to seem weak, even if they're not anything remotely close to weak. But friends will tell the truth about friends.
I trust you on how Green is. I don't need to contact Kotetsu.
[And maybe that means he should be a little more straightforward.]
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Nobody's gonna tell the truth about how they're doing, I don't think. Nobody wants to seem weak, even if they're not anything remotely close to weak. But friends will tell the truth about friends.
[He's quiet for several moments as he goes over every member of their team, analyzing.]
I'd say as a team we accomplished the objective. That we had enough people, took enough notes. If we were to stage an attack on the village tomorrow, I could give approaches and tips.
[A beat.]
But I can't say every person contributed equally. There's a couple... I don't know what they did. But our mission got achieved. If some aren't doing enough, transfer them. Don't punish the ones who did the job.
I'd say as a team we accomplished the objective. That we had enough people, took enough notes. If we were to stage an attack on the village tomorrow, I could give approaches and tips.
[A beat.]
But I can't say every person contributed equally. There's a couple... I don't know what they did. But our mission got achieved. If some aren't doing enough, transfer them. Don't punish the ones who did the job.
It's the same for me as well.
[he takes a drink.] What I don't understand is why even bother if we're going to destroy Macha in the first place.
[for that to happen - they must want something very badly on their part, and they didn't get it. it's difficult to say this without giving details of their mission to garrus, and he'd rather not break gag rules, but all the same. it makes for a good discussion topic.]
[he takes a drink.] What I don't understand is why even bother if we're going to destroy Macha in the first place.
[for that to happen - they must want something very badly on their part, and they didn't get it. it's difficult to say this without giving details of their mission to garrus, and he'd rather not break gag rules, but all the same. it makes for a good discussion topic.]
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Definitely. I'm ending my outpost duty in five; wanna meet outside our so-impressive fence?
[It's not impressive. But sometimes he amuses himself...]
Definitely. I'm ending my outpost duty in five; wanna meet outside our so-impressive fence?
[It's not impressive. But sometimes he amuses himself...]
FROM: michaelis.sebastian@cdc.org
Certainly. I can think of no better spot, so I will meet you there, Mr. Vakarian.
[ at least sebastian likes the joke...
Though regardless of bad jokes, Sebastian will absolutely be at the fence promptly, though that's no surprise. His attention to manners and detail was a given by now, at least. ]
Certainly. I can think of no better spot, so I will meet you there, Mr. Vakarian.
[ at least sebastian likes the joke...
Though regardless of bad jokes, Sebastian will absolutely be at the fence promptly, though that's no surprise. His attention to manners and detail was a given by now, at least. ]
Left a few pieces somewhere along the way, but I'm sure if I needed them they'd still be part of me.
[The teasing's light. He's not sure how she's doing. With Erin it's difficult at the best of times, but these are far from those.]
Talk to me, Erin.
[The teasing's light. He's not sure how she's doing. With Erin it's difficult at the best of times, but these are far from those.]
Talk to me, Erin.
[As the day goes on, Garrus is moving better and better. There's still a few aches and pains, but he's managing, so by the time he gets to Sebastian his pace is almost normal.]
Hey. What's going on? You really needed a break from Ciel, if your comments were anything to go by.
Hey. What's going on? You really needed a break from Ciel, if your comments were anything to go by.
Ours made some sense, in that way. End of Ajna, Green and Red got sent in to eliminate the apex species.
[He's got the liberty of no gag order except against Grey, but with the lack of talking about other orders from other parties he's not quite sure everyone's free.]
This way we know what we're doing when that time comes. And we'll need to be better equipped. The shai were smart, but they weren't quite sentient yet. No weapons, no villages. The neraki...
[Garrus shakes his head. The neraki's capabilities aren't the only reason this fight will be more difficult.]
[He's got the liberty of no gag order except against Grey, but with the lack of talking about other orders from other parties he's not quite sure everyone's free.]
This way we know what we're doing when that time comes. And we'll need to be better equipped. The shai were smart, but they weren't quite sentient yet. No weapons, no villages. The neraki...
[Garrus shakes his head. The neraki's capabilities aren't the only reason this fight will be more difficult.]
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